Up early preparing Johnny’s favorite breakfast of fresh eggs from our backyard coop, poached and topped with grilled marinated tomatoes and halloumi cheese!  Homemade scones almost done.. smells delicious! “

Oh, really? Because my son just ate a Lean Cuisine frozen pizza for breakfast..with my blessing. It was the french bread variety…I’m not a total monster..geesh.

FaceBooking at sunrise is a gamble. Roll the dice..good start to day or shitty start?  It has become a primary source of information dissemination, all of it, the good, the bad and the ugly.  (you’re whistling the theme now, aren’t you?  You’re seeing Clint in his poncho, spitting on the ground and saying something terrifyingly cool like..”You see, in this world there’s two kinds of people, my friend: those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig.”)

I think we can all agree on what’s good or bad news..but the ugly..highly subjective, and I’m just gonna leap into the abyss and say that parents who make the rest of us look bad with their endless perfectly prepared meals and daily updates on their child prodigies are the worst.

Photo after photo of eight  year old Anastasia and her visit with President Obama to discuss her award winning Doctoral Thesis on World Peace…*yawn*.  Scrolling on.

I might be jealous.

Doesn’t anyone have a victory I can relate to?  Am I the only parent who has to hide a tear of joy when she sees her 13 year old hang his wet towel up or put his dirty cereal bowl in the sink?  Or, *gasp* brush his teeth AND comb his hair..the very same morning? Am I the last parent who thinks a regular bowl of cheerios with a banana, all prepared by the child himself is a perfectly fine way to start their day?

I think you are out there…mothers just like me.  You’re there..scrolling, sipping your coffee, sheltering in place.  Maybe you’re watching your kid heat a frozen pizza for breakfast..I’m here for you, my Sisters.lean cuisine


13 thoughts on “Shamebook

    • Thanks for reading Bonnie..and as a Grandma I believe you are not held to any food rules..God knows my mother has been breaking them for years with my kids.

  1. He’ll, YES, Tess! We’re out here and banding together even as you write! (FYI…chicken noodle soup is a good breakfast, too. Any port in a storm, I always say…)

  2. Please tell me that that first paragraph is something you made up to make your point and NOT a real post !!!!???!!!

    • Well..I had to change the exact dish that was used because I didn’t want the person to take offense..the original dish was very fancy..involving eggs and expensive struck a nerve..obviously…

  3. So funny and so real. And for the record, whenever I gave your boys ice cream for breakfast, I made sure to add nuts and a cherry on top so they would have their important fruit and fiber.

  4. When Mellie was little we did lots of Lucky Charms. Cause I love them and still do! I always found supper and breakfast to be interchangeable. We always ate that way. Pizza is perfect for breakfast and nothing beats blueberry pancakes for supper! Happy Spring Tess!

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